April Fools
by Solitia
Summary: Baby ends up with a surprise he blames on Hojo


"Maki, you promised me last year you wouldn't pull any April Fool's jokes on me this year after that experience with the Nair in my conditioner bottle."

"And I also told you I would stop if you did. As I'm cleaning Sloppy Joe off of my new [iwhite pants[/i…" His voice trailed off as he pointed to a butt-printed sandwich sitting on his chair. Dark eyes leveled with bright blue. "It's on now."

"Oh come on! That's not that bad, is it? I do worse than that to you all the time!"

"I'll just make it something on the same level." The corner of his mouth turned and he suppressed a laugh. "I know just the thing."

"What? What are you doing?"

"You'll find out. I have an ass sandwich to eat," he commented dryly.

Baby spent the rest of the afternoon wondering just what it was Maki had planned for him. He'd noticed him in several different places throughout the day but only about half the time did he even acknowledge him. Maybe he was ignoring him? With a huff, Baby decided definitively that this was his ploy and got up from his desk, fully intending on breaking him out of it one way or another. He spied Maki at the end of the hall with a cup of coffee in his hand and grabbed the cup, set it down, and whipped him around by his arm, pinning him against the stand the pot and condiments were sitting on. "You listen to me! This little act of pretending like you don't know who I am is just ridiculous. You start talking to me right this second or I'm going to get angry!" He waved a single pointed finger at him in warning. Maki looked a lot like a deer in the headlights.

"Okay. I'm talking. To you. Now what?"

"That's better! Now don't you dare ignore me for the rest of the day. This whole April Fools thing is going just a BIT too far! You PROMISED after LAST YEAR."

"Okay. No more pranks."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

"Alright then." The little cherub was placated. "I'm going back to my desk. See you at lunch."

The noon hour came fairly quickly for him since he wasn't worried what prank Maki would be playing on him next. When he got to their usual table, Maki was in his suit.

"I thought you had today off."

"I did but somebody's sick so I had to get in uniform and come in. I said it wasn't such a big deal since you were working today anyway."

"Yea. How's lunch?"

"Not bad. Same cafeteria food as usual." His phone buzzed on the top of the table. "Hey, can you watch my tray for a minute?"

"Always."

Maki hustled out of the cafeteria and down the hall. He came back a short time later munching on an apple. Baby waited expectantly for him to come back to his tray, finally standing and waving as he wandered past a few tables away. He turned back to Baby and his brow furrowed in concentration before he wandered over.

"Hey there."

"Are you going to finish your lunch?"

"Um…"

"You got a lot of food if you aren't going to eat it."

"Uh… save it for me?"

"You asked me to watch it just a minute ago."

"Oh. Uh, yea. So… I'll… be right back again."

Baby blinked at him like he was a nutcase and sat back down, picking up his cell phone and dialed it. The familiar voice picked up.

"Papi, what in the hell have you been doing to Maki?"

"Why, whatever are you talking about, Baby?"

"Maki. He got up and left and then he came back but when he came back he wasn't him and he looked like him and the only explanation I've got is that you've been fucking with him even though we've established you WOULDN'T fuck with him on me. This had better not be some kind of an April Fool's Joke, Papi, because it's not funny."

"Baby, I haven't done anything to Maki except give him his Mako treatments when he's been scheduled. I haven't done anything to him."

"Well… if you see him… could you look at him for me? He's not acting right."

"If I should see him, Baby, I will look at him for you."

"Thank you, Papi!" he chirped before he hung up.

Maki returned to the table and picked up his fork.

"So what was that?"

"What was what?"

"That little stunt with the apple."

He looked at Baby in confusion. "What apple?"

"You were eating an apple and you came in here and you acted all crazy."

"Crazy? Crazy like how?"

"Crazy like you forgot you were eating and told me to save this for you and then… Maki, what the hell's going on with you today?"

"Um. I don't know?"

"Yea. Right. Is this some sort of prank?"

"Not that I know of. Why?"

"What do you MEAN, not that you know of?" Baby was growing irritated and propped a tightly clenched fist against his hip. "Do you want to go see the doctor?"

"Why would I want to go see the doctor? I'm perfectly fine."

"You are NOT fine if you're acting like a nutter. I'm taking you to the doctor as soon as you've finished your lunch."

"Baby, I do not need to go to the doctor."

"Yes you do. Now eat your lunch so we can go." He said it in such a way that Maki closed his mouth against the protest. It wouldn't do any good even if he did.

Baby left Maki with Hojo for evaluation and returned to his desk, sitting quietly and working diligently. It wasn't more than an hour later before Maki turned up at Baby's desk. "I need to see Rufus Shinra, please."

His eyes turned up. "Did Papi find anything?"

"Uh…."

"He didn't tell you?" Baby flipped through his datebook and looked into Rufus's schedule. "Sorry, he has an appointment. He'll be free in fifteen minutes. Want me to call you when he's free?"

"Uh, yea. Sure. If you want to. That'd be great. Thanks." He took two steps back and turned to leave.

"Are you busy right at the moment?"

"Not… right now. Why?"

"Well… I was thinking…" Baby walked around the desk and crossed the floor slowly. "If you're not busy…" His fingertips ran over the lapel of Maki's jacket.

It wasn't the same shade. It was a darker shade of blue. "Why are you not in uniform?"

"Excuse me?"

"Why are you not in uniform? I don't remember you having this type of suit before." His brow knit together and he looked up at his lover as though he were seeing a stranger. "E-excuse me… just a moment." He turned for his desk and picked up the phone, dialing Hojo's number. "Do you still have Maki down there, Papi?"

"No, I sent him on his way. I'm working on tests. Why? Is something wrong?"

"No. No, Papi. Nevermind. Thank you." He hung up.

"You lied and said no more jokes," Baby purred.

"I never lied. I meant it when I said no more jokes."

"But why are you changing clothes so subtlely and making little offhanded comments. And why are you being so odd today?"

"Am I being odd?"

"Yes, you're being odd," he purred, pressing into Maki and wrapping his arms around his waist. "Wanna go screw?"

"Seriously? You're working, aren't you?"

"Since when has that stopped me?"

"Uh. Never?"

"That's right. We can go over in the supply closet and you can fuck me silly. What do you say?"

"Uh… yea, sure."

Their games continued all day during work. If Maki was going to play games, so was Baby. Every time he'd encountered Maki and could slip away, Baby had taken him here and there around the building and fucked him soundly. By the end of the night when they'd slipped into bed together, Baby fell straight to sleep, a first for Maki. He usually had to go a round or two before Baby would even contemplate sleep.

When he woke the next morning, Maki's long hair ticked his nose. He opened his eyes, shoved at his hair and flipped it over his back and rolled over, nestling down again. [iWait[/i. He opened them again, seeing a shoulder covered in long black strands. Baby rolled over, seeing Maki laying on his belly. Turning back, he was on his side.

Baby jackknifed in bed. "PAPI! WHAT DID YOU DO??"

Maki sat up with a start and his doppelganger did the same, both of them turning toward Baby with wide eyes. 

"Baby. I forgot to tell you. My brother was coming into town for business with Shinra. He's staying with us for a couple of days. It's okay."

"Your… brother?"

"We're twins," the stated in unison, thumbing at each other.

"Twins?" Baby looked slightly nauseous.

"Twins. Why?"

"Maki? I think I fucked your brother."

"Yea, I figured you did when he started talking about how friendly the secretaries were around here."

"And… you're okay with that?'

"Yea. It's not like he doesn't look like me. Or that you didn't think I was crazy. The first time I wondered what was going on, after that, though, I figured it out. I just let it go on and let you think I was insane. I'm surprised Hojo didn't tell you."

"You're [isuch[/i an ass."

"And I have Sloppy Joe on my pants. April Fools."


End file.
